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Watch your Words (Parenting-5)

Parents, watch your words, use them well, use them wisely, and watch your child become exactly what you expect of him/her!! It's as simple as that! Seriously.

Though all the hype about positivity vs negativity .. vibes, energy et all do hold true.. nonetheless I base my recommendations to you on a scientifically researched fact called the 'Rosenthal effect'.

It has been scientifically researched and proven that children live up to (or down to ) the expectations of their significant adult care givers.. ie primarily their parents and teachers. That is to say that children will inadvertently perform to meet your expectations of them..They will perform better or worse, based on your expectations of them!!

So watch your words the next time you set out to call him/her a 'loser' a 'failure' , a 'good for nothing', or a...

Let me explain it to you using a hypothetical situation. Let's say your child behaves in a rude and ill mannered way.. In response..

scenario 1 : You reprimand him/her saying " You are so rude and ill mannered... you must.... you mustn't.. "

What the child hears out of these words is.. my parent thinks ' I am rude and ill mannered' .. so that is who I am.. and ends up becoming a rude and ill mannered person.

scenario 2 : You reprimand him/her saying " You are such a polite and well mannered child... I never expected.. I am shocked.. you must.. you mustn't.."

What the child hears out of these words is.. my parent thinks 'I am polite and well mannered' .. so that's what I must be.. and ends up becoming a polite and well mannered child...!!!

That's the magic of the Rosenthal effect :-)

So go ahead , call your child a 'winner', a 'go-getter', an 'A grader' (yes it works with marks too!)..and while you are at it, ensure that no 'well meaning' teacher is pulling him/her down either. [Sadly, many teachers believe that children need to be belittled into working harder... that if they appreciate the child he/she will become reticent and stop putting effort..!! ]

Well, since you are into the secret now, remember to watch your words with your child... and help your child mold into the best version of him/herself and thus enjoy a beautigul bachpan.

Happy parenting.

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